The subway. So many different people are riding the subway with me. Today I was on the train with the marine, the business man, the mom with the baby, the teenagers, and the bum who obviously just peed himself and nobody cared. People here come in all shapes, sizes and ages.

On a subway or a bus I often see the opportunity to check on myself. Because when there are a few spots available, you have to make a choice where to sit, and a dozens of little thoughts are flying through your mind: why do I prefer this place over that one, who is sitting next to it and etc. I like to think that I am open-minded and certain characteristics don't influence me so I am testing myself from time to time.

Today as I was doing that on the ride home I discovered that I had an uneasy feeling. There was no reason for it, nothing happened, but I was very much aware how many people are riding the train with me, and I have to trust them to be civil and adequate. At some point I was left alone in the car but it didn't help me to relax just heightened the sense of being unsafe and thinking that I should dig up my mace from the times I was jogging a lot.

I had no reasons to feel that way, so I investigated where those feelings could come from and I figured out that it is probably the result of the bad night sleep, I was turning and tossing all night, and was feeling more tired today than usual, and I know that my sleep is pretty important for me.

The little things like that can influence us, our moods and behaviors and most of the time we don't know that it is happening because we don't have time to stop, think and analyze, why we just did what we did, or feel the certain way. I always find amusing when people with such assurance say that they are objective. I don't think humans are capable of being objective, because we carry so much feelings and emotions and many other things at any point of the day. And everything is coming out from deep inside of us to the outside. We can try to get rid of our preconceptions as much as we can but we never can get rid of all of them because we might not be even aware that we have them.

Our believe system is created from our experience growing up in a certain environment, meeting certain people, going through the life events and our personalities are formed by all of that. All of that information is processed in someway, conclusions are made and you move on and don't even know how much or how little this thing, that just happened, influenced you. Everyone goes through millions of big and little experiences which makes us a complex creatures. Of course not to forget that with the age we are less and less capable of stepping out of our comfort zone and already formed opinions. It is very hard to be truly objective after all so I strongly believe that there are no objective people.

My applauds to anyone who have reached this point. Thank you.